Official Luthiers Forum!

Solely owned and operated by Lance Kragenbrink
It is currently Mon Dec 11, 2017 9:21 pm


All times are UTC - 5 hours


Forum rules


Be nice, no cussin and enjoy!




Post new topic Reply to topic  [ 7 posts ] 
Author Message
 Post subject: Bad luthiers in hell.
PostPosted: Tue Nov 21, 2017 9:06 am 
Offline
Koa
Koa

Joined: Thu Feb 12, 2009 10:27 pm
Posts: 1923
Location: South Carolina
First name: John
Last Name: Cox
Focus: Build
Status: Amateur
I had a good laugh when I saw this in the other post.

david farmer wrote:
If there are bad luthiers doing re-frets in hell, they are endlessly turning stainless super jumbo wire into cute little triangle shapes. :)


Mine...

Its a beautiful sunny day. Light breeze. Not a cloud in the sky.
Spraying cat poly outside to avoid the fumes indoors..
A beautiful curly maple back and sides stained perfectly to pop the grain, heavy bearclaw top...

And there is a curious little bird hopping around watching you work...
And each evening.. As you finish cleaning out the gun - you look at your work - which looked perfect as you were doing it.. And there are all the little bits of bark, hair, pollen, grass, and bugs everywhere.... And it all has to come back off...

But the weather forcast for tomorrow looks perfect.. 70 degrees... Sunny.. Light breeze...



These users thanked the author truckjohn for the post (total 2): Hesh (Tue Nov 21, 2017 3:44 pm) • DannyV (Tue Nov 21, 2017 12:30 pm)
Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Tue Nov 21, 2017 9:43 am 
Offline
Contributing Member
Contributing Member
User avatar

Joined: Fri Jul 10, 2009 4:44 am
Posts: 3185
First name: colin
Last Name: north
Country: Scotland.
Focus: Build
Status: Semi-pro
How about something like this with a fine bug mesh to close the opening and a fan ducted into the back?
https://www.wagnerspraytech.com/products/paint-sprayers/spray-tent/

_________________
“There are two men inside the artist, the poet and the craftsman. One is born a poet. One becomes a craftsman.” - Emile Zola



These users thanked the author Colin North for the post: Hesh (Tue Nov 21, 2017 3:44 pm)
Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Tue Nov 21, 2017 11:28 am 
Offline
Koa
Koa

Joined: Thu Feb 12, 2009 10:27 pm
Posts: 1923
Location: South Carolina
First name: John
Last Name: Cox
Focus: Build
Status: Amateur
While UPS delivers almost everywhere - I am not sure they deliver to hell. ;)

They probably do - but every package is damaged and they won't accept a claim...


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Tue Nov 21, 2017 1:05 pm 
Offline
Brazilian Rosewood
Brazilian Rosewood

Joined: Sat Jan 15, 2005 12:50 pm
Posts: 3027
Location: United States
So one day who should show up at the Pearly Gates but the soul of the great Stradivari. St. Peter looks up the data base, and finds that they have nothing on him. All he ever did was make fiddles, so, on the one hand, he never did anything to warrant damnation, but then, on the other hand, he never did much to advance his spiritual state either. Not knowing where to put him. Peter appeals to a Higher Authority, and the word comes down that he is to be shown the alternatives, and given his choice. So an angel is assigned to show him around heaven.

It's pretty nice; sort of like Club Med but it never shows up on your credit card. At the end they come to a low building with lots of windows, and when they go it it's violin maker's shop, all set up and ready, with the tools sharp and the glue warm. "So...", says the angel, "if you come to heaven this will be your shop. You can work here through eternity, discovering the secrets of that craft you loved in life. Whenever a good violinist comes to heaven, they will play your instruments: they will be played in the Heavenly Choir before the Throne of God; what more could a man want?" But, Strad's a business man; that last luthier to die rich. He wants to see the counter offer before he makes up his mind. So it's off to hell, where a devil conducts the tour.

There's no getting around it: it's grim. Finally they come to a sort of quieter corner of hell where it's not so hot, and there's a low building with lots of windows. It's a violin maker's shop, just like the one upstairs. "See.." says the devil, "whatever they've go we've got, AND, I can offer you two things they can't. In the first place, you know how fiddlers are: we're going to see a lot more good ones down here than they'll se up there. But secondly, and more important, the violin is, after all, the devil's instrument. I can tell you all the secrets of violin making; you won't have to work through eternity to find them out!"

Well, who could refuse. Strad shakes hands with the devil. Then the devil spends about forty-five minutes telling him everything he didn't already know about violin making.

As he finishes up, Strad is sitting there scratching his head. The devil asks: "Is there something I left out, something you didn't understand?" "No.." replies Strad, "its just that that I've got this nice shop. It's no hotter here than Cremona in the summer; I can get used to this. All of these good violinists are going to come by to play my instruments, and you've told me all the secrets of violin making: why is this hell?" And the devil shrugs and answers: "No wood!"

From Tom Knatt



These users thanked the author Alan Carruth for the post (total 7): SteveCourtright (Mon Nov 27, 2017 2:04 pm) • truckjohn (Tue Nov 21, 2017 8:16 pm) • Clinchriver (Tue Nov 21, 2017 5:37 pm) • Durero (Tue Nov 21, 2017 5:28 pm) • NightOwl (Tue Nov 21, 2017 5:07 pm) • Hesh (Tue Nov 21, 2017 3:46 pm) • Bryan Bear (Tue Nov 21, 2017 2:22 pm)
Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Tue Nov 21, 2017 1:56 pm 
Offline
Contributing Member
Contributing Member
User avatar

Joined: Sun Mar 06, 2011 12:04 am
Posts: 3483
First name: Chris
Last Name: Pile
City: Wichita
State: Kansas
Country: Good old US of A
^^^ THIS IS GENIUS! ^^^

_________________
Stop saying "How stupid can you get?" Too many people are taking it as a challenge!



These users thanked the author Chris Pile for the post: Hesh (Tue Nov 21, 2017 3:45 pm)
Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Tue Nov 21, 2017 3:45 pm 
Offline
Old Growth Brazilian Rosewood
Old Growth Brazilian Rosewood
User avatar

Joined: Fri Nov 02, 2007 9:49 am
Posts: 9891
Location: Ann Arbor, Michigan
First name: Hesh
Last Name: Breakstone
Country: United States
Status: Professional
truckjohn wrote:
While UPS delivers almost everywhere - I am not sure they deliver to hell. ;)

They probably do - but every package is damaged and they won't accept a claim...


DHell delivers there......;)


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Tue Nov 21, 2017 8:25 pm 
Offline
Koa
Koa

Joined: Thu Feb 12, 2009 10:27 pm
Posts: 1923
Location: South Carolina
First name: John
Last Name: Cox
Focus: Build
Status: Amateur
Alan Carruth wrote:
why is this hell?" And the devil shrugs and answers: "No wood!"


Epic!

I can imagine Old Strad turning around and with a look of horror - he gazes upon a mountain of cracked Lyrachord bowls and bent aluminum necks stacked almost all the way to heaven... The devil claps a warm hand on his shoulder and winks as he says... "Well Strad, my boy.. Time to get going.. These cursed things won't fix themselves...."


Top
 Profile  
 
Display posts from previous:  Sort by  
Post new topic Reply to topic  [ 7 posts ] 

All times are UTC - 5 hours


Who is online

Users browsing this forum: Alaska Splty Woods, Bing [Bot], bobgramann, TimAllen and 7 guests


You cannot post new topics in this forum
You cannot reply to topics in this forum
You cannot edit your posts in this forum
You cannot delete your posts in this forum
You cannot post attachments in this forum

Jump to:  
Powered by phpBB® Forum Software © phpBB Group
phpBB customization services by 2by2host.com