Official Luthiers Forum! :: View topic - September " Doofus Of The Month " Winner "

Lame guys. If you can save it you can't call it doofus. Do this thread justice and post award winning screwups which drop you to the scrap pile!

Filippo

Chris Ensor wrote:

I let my wife talk me into building her a china cabinet a year plus ago and am just now getting the thing all wrapped up. I hope to be done in the next week or so. Flat Palm to Forehead. Never again.

Ok ... Chris is at the top of the doofus heap right now! wow7-eyes

Filippo

p.s. Chris when I built the luthiery shop I told my wife - "The First Rule of the Shop: No Furniture."

muse wrote:

Thanks for the heads up on the humidity issue. I have to ask, did you intend to build a lefty?

Lame guys. If you can save it you can't call it doofus. Do this thread justice and post award winning screwups which drop you to the scrap pile!

Filippo

Okay ... so guys, this is how doofus is done. Learn from a master.

Filippo

Come on, even if they are really silly?...

OK, customer for a classical asks for a 7th fret marker. I use the copper insulation wire from Romex for markers - I like how it looks.

Hole drilled in side of fret board, marker glued in, everything filed and sanded flush. Oh ^%$#, it's on the treble side. How did I do that. OK, flip over neck, drill, glue in wire, file and sand, looks perfect.

Oh (&%&, both of them are on the 8th fret, not the 7th!!!

Isn't ebony forgiving to repair? Drill out both markers, ebony dust+CA, repeat as needed, filing flush as we go. New 7th fret marker goes in, right side of neck [:Y:]

, looks good. Boy you can really make simple things difficult sometimes.

Filippo's criterion eliminates this one though. Ebony is just too darned easy to fix

Jim Kirby wrote:

Come on, even if they are really silly?...

Well Jim, as far as I'm considered, silly mistakes add character to the thread, but true doofus are the no save scenarios. Like cutting a cutaway into a non-cutaway top. So post the silly stuff. I love how you did it upside down AND on the 8th fret. The save just puts you out of doofus range. I built an electric last year for a left handed player. One early morning, before coffee, I put all the dots on the wrong side. Had to flip it and put dots on the right side. We called it the "Jimi Hendrix" option :-)

Filippo

Author:	WudWerkr [ Thu Sep 15, 2011 5:15 pm ]
Post subject:	September " Doofus Of The Month " Winner "
Well guys its time again for the Coveted " Doofus Of the Month " Post. Fess up fellas , we all have the stories . I really hate to give the award to someone who got hurt ( dont want to make light of danger ) . However last Months recipent is Probably ready to " hand " it off to someone else . I will start it off again since I did one last Night . I have a beautifull set of Lacewood sides and back bent for a dread . I measured and marked the sides carefully and went to the band saw . The old addage , Measure TWICE cut once was not in my mind. If I continue with this Build I will have a nice dread shape with a lower bout of 14-1/4" . rather small wouldnt ya say ! OK YOUR TURN !!!

Author:	thebolo [ Thu Sep 15, 2011 5:49 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: September " Doofus Of The Month "
Thats not a doofus of the month award. You've invented a new guitar design. The mini-dred!!!

Author:	Lavrov Guitars [ Thu Sep 15, 2011 8:12 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: September " Doofus Of The Month "
So I got the fret-cutting ruler template thing from lmi to slot my own fretboards with a table saw, and I cut up my two fingerboards. All is gerat, the slots are amazing and I'm all excited that it turned out so well. Pretty cool huh? Not really, actually. After cutting them and binding one of them, I decided to put it on my neck to see how it will look, and looks great. Except one thing. The 14th fret is not the body joint like i planned! My plans were 100% accurate so I have NO IDEA how this happened.....yet. Came out to be almost the 13th fret at the body! First I thought I completely messed up the neck measurements somehow. Then I checked the fingerboard against my first guitar, and the fret slots go off the further down they go. So I went to bed confused as ever as to how in the world I did that. But I couldn't sleep not knowing what happened, so I decided to go and check one more thing. I got the fingergoard and checked it against my first guitar again. Except this time, I put the first fret that I cut at the nut. And guess what? They lined up perfectly! Now that wouldn't be a problem if I left my fingerboards longer and cut more slots into them, but like always I had to rush and cut something like you said, measure twice cut once (NOT!), so my fingerboards are way too short and I need new ones Apparantly the first fret slot on the template thing marks the nut, that's how I understood at least, right? I used it as the first fret so that threw everything off. Oh well, all I wasted was a whole bunch of my time and some money. Coulda been worse oh and I actually did an inlay in one of them, was gonna do for both but decided to wait just a little for the second fretboard. It was like a spiral vine around the twelveth fret-dot, which also took a little time. All to waste

Author:	alan stassforth [ Thu Sep 15, 2011 8:34 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: September " Doofus Of The Month "
Lavrov, save those for a short scale project.

Author:	WudWerkr [ Thu Sep 15, 2011 9:34 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: September " Doofus Of The Month "
Filippo Morelli wrote: Lame guys. If you can save it you can't call it doofus. Do this thread justice and post award winning screwups which drop you to the scrap pile! Filippo Enlighten Us Oh Great " Master Doofus "

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Author:	alan stassforth [ Thu Sep 15, 2011 11:02 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: September " Doofus Of The Month "
Filippo cut a board too long, once!

Author:	muse [ Fri Sep 16, 2011 12:22 am ]
Post subject:	Re: September " Doofus Of The Month "
Not sure of this qualifies as a "Doofus of the Month" mistake as its more of a newbie mistake. But in the hope some one will learn from my mistake... Here is a picture of my beautifully (imho) braces getting scalloped. Se how nicely it sits in my radius dish? After a few more hours working on the braces and a few trips across town to Rick & Cats shop for some voicing advice I was a happy camper with a top ready to be glued on some sides. A couple days later I head out to the shop to give the top a final sanding and find this: I had thought that the first think an aspiring luthier should buy is a good set of chisels. Now I am convinced the first thing should be a GOOD hygrometer. When I glued up the braces I knew it was an unusually humid day for Seattle so I check the hygrometer in my shop, 56%, high for gluing braces but I was anxious to get some work done and figured I would be Okay. Turns out my hygrometer is off by about 15%. The RH was really about 71%. So here is what the top looks like after tonight: Turn out getting the braces off is a lot harder than getting them on! On the bright side, I wanted to change the bracing pattern a bit anyway, I got a lot of extra experience working with my chisels, a chance to inspect my glue joints and to top it all off I get to voice another top with out haveing to build another whole guitar. Now I have multiple hygrometers in my shop. Most importantly though, I learned NOT to glue up braces if the humidity is over 50%. Lesson learned!!

Author:	WudWerkr [ Fri Sep 16, 2011 8:56 am ]
Post subject:	Re: September " Doofus Of The Month "
Maybe its just my lack of experience , but the bracing on that top seemed a bit small " thinned to close to top " Im probably wrong .

Author:	stan thomison [ Fri Sep 16, 2011 9:10 am ]
Post subject:	Re: September " Doofus Of The Month "
Wud Werker You may find that you will have a great little guitar there. Maybe a messup. I do that and it is a new design. To the guy with the fretboards. Save them and make some 13 fret guitars or shortscale. Not a waste, just make a few that will work with the boards in time. Thing is you can store them until you need or want to use them. Again, sometimes mistakes are just design change. That is my story and stick to it. Never know when a commisson comes around and those things will be handy.

Author:	Bryan Bear [ Fri Sep 16, 2011 9:50 am ]
Post subject:	Re: September " Doofus Of The Month "
I'm not getting the advice to use the fretboards on shorter scale instruments. they are already slotted for a particular scale, just missing the higher frets, no? I'd use them for 13 or 12 fretters, or just not have the end of the fretboard hit the soundhole. Due to a plumbing malfunction, I am currently without a kitchen, workshoppe and free time to work. The bright side is, I won't be able to do anything to qualify this month.

Author:	Chris Ensor [ Fri Sep 16, 2011 1:54 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: September " Doofus Of The Month "
I let my wife talk me into building her a china cabinet a year plus ago and am just now getting the thing all wrapped up. I hope to be done in the next week or so. Flat Palm to Forehead. Never again.

Author:	Rod True [ Fri Sep 16, 2011 2:40 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: September " Doofus Of The Month "
Filippo Morelli wrote: Chris Ensor wrote: I let my wife talk me into building her a china cabinet a year plus ago and am just now getting the thing all wrapped up. I hope to be done in the next week or so. Flat Palm to Forehead. Never again. Ok ... Chris is at the top of the doofus heap right now! Filippo p.s. Chris when I built the luthiery shop I told my wife - "The First Rule of the Shop: No Furniture." And we've seen how that's worked out for you

Author:	WudWerkr [ Sat Sep 17, 2011 10:12 am ]
Post subject:	Re: September " Doofus Of The Month "
Bows to the master !!

Author:	banjopicks [ Sun Sep 18, 2011 8:02 am ]
Post subject:	Re: September " Doofus Of The Month "
Did he forget to take his meds?

Author:	quentinjazz [ Tue Sep 20, 2011 2:13 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: September " Doofus Of The Month "
Hi, thanks for this very unique post! My doofus occured yesterday: I spent 2 hours to make a perfect marquetry with mosaïc for a rosette, with lots of b/w/b purflings.. I used the Stewmac rosette cutter with my dremel to make the contours, I started in the inside and.. when I tried to make the contour of the outside, my paper with the wood glued to it moved from the center without me noticing it. So as I was going to complete the outer circle I realized that my rosette was not round anymore... It went directly to the trash... I was in a killing mood.. This was a souvenir pic before the disaster happened. RIP Rosette..

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Author:	Scott A [ Sun Sep 18, 2011 9:11 am ]
Post subject:	Re: September " Doofus Of The Month "
[quote="muse"]Not sure of this qualifies as a "Doofus of the Month" mistake as its more of a newbie mistake. But in the hope some one will learn from my mistake... Here is a picture of my beautifully (imho) braces getting scalloped. Se how nicely it sits in my radius dish? Muse, Thanks for the heads up on the humidity issue. I have to ask, did you intend to build a lefty?

Author:	muse [ Sun Sep 18, 2011 10:38 am ]
Post subject:	Re: September " Doofus Of The Month "
Scott A wrote: muse wrote: Thanks for the heads up on the humidity issue. I have to ask, did you intend to build a lefty? Scott, I am VERY happy to say yes, the lefty part is intentional. But thanks for checkin'. Thanks, Carl.

Author:	Jim Kirby [ Sun Sep 18, 2011 1:53 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: September " Doofus Of The Month "
Filippo Morelli wrote: Lame guys. If you can save it you can't call it doofus. Do this thread justice and post award winning screwups which drop you to the scrap pile! Filippo Come on, even if they are really silly?... OK, customer for a classical asks for a 7th fret marker. I use the copper insulation wire from Romex for markers - I like how it looks. Hole drilled in side of fret board, marker glued in, everything filed and sanded flush. Oh ^%$#, it's on the treble side. How did I do that. OK, flip over neck, drill, glue in wire, file and sand, looks perfect. Oh (&%&, both of them are on the 8th fret, not the 7th!!! Isn't ebony forgiving to repair? Drill out both markers, ebony dust+CA, repeat as needed, filing flush as we go. New 7th fret marker goes in, right side of neck , looks good. Boy you can really make simple things difficult sometimes. Filippo's criterion eliminates this one though. Ebony is just too darned easy to fix.

Author:	Jim Kirby [ Sun Sep 18, 2011 2:00 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: September " Doofus Of The Month "
Filippo Morelli wrote: Okay ... so guys, this is how doofus is done. Learn from a master. Filippo Ah, but doesn't that represent the distinction between a mere mortal, who makes mistakes, and a master, who can successfully hide all of them?

Author:	WudWerkr [ Sun Sep 18, 2011 5:52 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: September " Doofus Of The Month "
Quote: Come on, even if they are really silly?... OK, customer for a classical asks for a 7th fret marker. I use the copper insulation wire from Romex for markers - I like how it looks. Hole drilled in side of fret board, marker glued in, everything filed and sanded flush. Oh ^%$#, it's on the treble side. How did I do that. OK, flip over neck, drill, glue in wire, file and sand, looks perfect. Oh (&%&, both of them are on the 8th fret, not the 7th!!! Isn't ebony forgiving to repair? Drill out both markers, ebony dust+CA, repeat as needed, filing flush as we go. New 7th fret marker goes in, right side of neck , looks good. Boy you can really make simple things difficult sometimes. Filippo's criterion eliminates this one though. Ebony is just too darned easy to fix No it doesnt ! This is EXACTLY what its all about !

Author:	WudWerkr [ Mon Sep 19, 2011 8:16 am ]
Post subject:	Re: September " Doofus Of The Month "
Filippo Morelli wrote: Jim Kirby wrote: Come on, even if they are really silly?... Well Jim, as far as I'm considered, silly mistakes add character to the thread, but true doofus are the no save scenarios. Like cutting a cutaway into a non-cutaway top. So post the silly stuff. I love how you did it upside down AND on the 8th fret. The save just puts you out of doofus range. I built an electric last year for a left handed player. One early morning, before coffee, I put all the dots on the wrong side. Had to flip it and put dots on the right side. We called it the "Jimi Hendrix" option Filippo Did you look at yourself in the mirror and say " Doofus " Im not disagreening with my esteemed friend , the whole point of the thread is to be light hearted , so please share your " doofus " moments .

Author:	truckjohn [ Mon Sep 19, 2011 2:57 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: September " Doofus Of The Month "
Ok.. Here's my most recent.... It's the reason for my "Glue in the fret slots" post.... Working on a 4-string tenor guitar... I am finally getting back around to finishing it up - it was part of MIMF's $100 Acoustic challenge last year. It's completely made of pallet wood except for the fretboard... which is literally the cheapest slotted fretboard that LMI sells.... It's some sort of dark, chippy wood...... Got my Peruvian walnut/maple binding glued on - and it's glued on wrong.. Somehow, the binding rode up a bit..... so I gotta pull it back off of one side.... The binding breaks in 4-places when un-sticking it.... Glue it back together.... 2 extra days... Now, once the glue is all good and dried, I plane off the extra and start looking in the fret slots - which are like 25% filled with hardened Titebond.... So I start chipping it out - which has never been a problem before.. but it takes forever.... 2 extra days.... And while I am chipping it out, the fret slots start chipping out REAL bad! Remember the part about the cheapest board LMI sells... Apparently, there was more runout and swirl in it than usual..... So.. I saved all the sanding dust from radiusing the board - and now I am filling in chips around the slots one at a time with CA and sawdust.... I can do like 2 in a day... so add another 8 days.... Then, gotta re-radius the whole thing again.... Another day So I have like 16 days involved in a fretboard that would normally to make the same progress that would usually take me about 10-minutes.... but I saved like $7.00 on that fretboard a year ago.... Thanks

Author:	Colin North [ Tue Sep 20, 2011 4:21 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: September " Doofus Of The Month "
Stuck the new 80 grit sandaper on my 15' radius dish and sanded the rims for the back. Only I stuck the sandpaper on the wrong side of the dish and sanded the rims - flat.

Author:	Kelby [ Tue Sep 20, 2011 6:08 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: September " Doofus Of The Month "
I'm not sure who was starring in that video, but I sure cringed when he ran that neck along the jointer. Good way to lose a finger. Or a whole handful.